TG crime title

The Chinese Takeout one really needs the heroine to look oriental

Heh. If you have to explain it, then yeah, it's really not working.

For the record: Okay, so Dave, in the blonde, is trying to find a body for his friend (call him "Tom"). Dave is looking for a ... er, "slap and tickle" with a Chinese girl, so that's what he's trying to get for Tom. But they're out of Chinese, so he asks Tom if he'll take Thai instead. Tom, reasonably, points out that Dave is the one who wants an Oriental playmate; presumably Dave got himself into a blonde because that's the kind of girl Tom was wanting to play with. (I guess it's a bit of a subversion of the usual gag, where you pick a body you want to wear; here, they don't particularly care who they're wearing, they just want the other guy in a body that will appeal to them.) So, no, the blonde doesn't have to be Oriental.

Okay, let's just drop a curtain on that.

This will the last of the "Body Crime" backlog [**], though I've got a few new ones that are cooking. With this post comes four OT bonus covers.

"He Wanted Her Lover for Himself": Don't you just love all those pronouns? You practically need graph paper to keep it all straight.

Bonus, OT stuff:

This issue of "Body Crime," you'll notice, includes a sticker boasting it contains a reprint from "The Chameleon". I stuck this in because the original artwork had an element there I couldn't remove.

And what is "The Chameleon"? It's a general TF title I made up for covers I liked but where I couldn't squeeze a TG element in. As such, it would be OT around here, but I've attached four covers that are almost TG, in the sense that they vaguely imply a collision somewhere between genders.

"Gorilla My Dreams": When it first started publishing in the early 1940s, the title was "Tales from the Chameleon," and the editor stuck little blurbs of his own under the cover synopses. You shouldn't trust what he says, by the way. For instance, he must have possessed a truly prodigious blower if the quote on this cover is to be believed.

"Motor Hari": Just an excuse for the story title.

"Too Ghoul for School": This one could've been a "Reality Flux," I supposed. But I have a creator's weakness for the blurb; the idea that an 8- or 12-page comic can not only capture the "horror" of high school but do so with "nuance and terror" tickles me, at least.

"My Boyfriend the Bitch": I like this one, but like "Chinese Takeout" the intent will probably be unclear--in this case because of the presence of the boyfriend's body in the image. If you follow out the plot idea to its logical conclusion, you ought to figure out that if the guy's mind is in the dog, then the dog's mind is operating the man's body; presumably he's wandering off to do what bears also do the woods. But it requires thinking things through, which is a bad thing for a cover to ask you to do.

Also, the magazine apparently suffered a cataclysmically ugly redesign in the 1960s.

** I have three really crummy covers that I'm not going to bother to put up. And I have a fourth—my personal favorite BC cover. But I'm writing a story based on it. Unfortunately, the cover gives the whole damn story away ...

Oi vey!

You know what's hard? Coming up with entertaining TG covers with a contemporary flavor. Comics today sure feature some great art, and that's a problem: there's no cheez, and even when something nasty is promised the covers make it look like an art house movie.

So after sweating over a half-dozen possibilities I think I'm probably just going to leave the post-1990 world to content itself with these two covers. I share them only as a record of a stab at an edgier, contemporary aesthetic.

"Body of Evidence": You know it's bad when the only humor you can work in relies on an (at best) glancing reference to the main character in "Fargo."

"Assault on Precinct 69": Maybe kind of funny, if you're in a generous mood.

Oh, I give up ...

THANKS,
Body shop show rooms is an excellent story & use of pic
Bellhop, LOL! I wonder what is going on?
Treachery of the Heart. FUNNY & VERY GOOD STORY
Chinese Takeout, LOL
Viktor Kano, ROFLOL!

ERIC

Three new "Body Crime" covers.

"The Warden Takes a Wife": Meh, but maybe it works. That's too obviously an electric chair.
"Three-Dollar William": One counterfeit suggests another.
"The Prickening": Finally using Andi's great "Body Crime" logo, which suggests a 1970s vibe to me, at least.

Some advise on yoour story. Put the cover at the END rather than the beginning if you think it gives thee whole story away
He Wanted Her Lover for Himself, wickedly funny!
Gorilla My Dreams", OUCH!
Too Ghoul, Good story. Was he planning on stealing her body?
Body of Evidence, well done
Assault on Precinct 69, ROFLOL
The Warden Takes a Wife, Good. I liked the blurb - My heart belongs t o daddy but my Mommy got my body!
Three-Dollar William, funny & clever
Three-Dollar William, funny

Some advise on yoour story. Put the cover at the END rather than the beginning if you think it gives thee whole story away

? I'm not sure what you mean by putting "the cover" at the end.

New BC attached.

Love the recent covers!

The Warden Takes a Wife - If only!
Three Dollar William -- this was the only one I thought could have been better. The stance of the woman seems to read "She took my body!" Perhaps that was too obvious. Congrats for trying something less so.
The Prickening -- Damn right. The horror!
Cain and Mabel -- This is perhaps your best yet. Chilling -- and out of all of them, it seems the most like an authentic, perfect, 50s crime cover.

The Prickening is real "nightmare fuel"!

Cain and Mabel looks very good. As Femur says, it's very authentic. For me though, the story is a bit puzzling.

Presumably the idea is that the guy with the cosh is the brother-in-law swapped into the husband's body (and the guy on the ground the husband?). Then cosh-guy swaps with the wife, putting her in the husband's body? This would leave him with the problem of killing the husband's body with only a woman's strength, and land him with two dead bodies.

If I'd found that cover first, I would probably have imagined that the guy taking the dirt nap was the husband, and that cosh-guy was the brother-in-law. The girl's dialogue would have been: "My God! Y- you've killed my husband!" and cosh-guy's: "Yes... and in a few minutes I will be his widow!". That would however still leave brother-in-law in the girl's body to bump off the wife in his old one.

An alternative might be that the body-theft is not a swap, but a one-way jump that leaves the exit body dead, and overwrites the mind in the receiving body. This would avoid the brother-in-law's problem of having to kill the husband's body after stealing the wife's.

It's scary how much thought I give these things...

For me though, the story is a bit puzzling. ... It's scary how much thought I give these things...

Would you be more scared if I told you I went through almost the exact same set of mental gymnastics while making and editing it? :p

The imagined scenario (I saw when I was done) has the guy intending to take the woman's body and to kill her in her new body. So far so good: it's that threat which I think gives the cover its chill. But there's a fundamental mechanical problem: if he's in a woman, how is he going to kill a man? Well, it's doable, naturally, but it gives one pause. The only way out is to give a back story—kind of like the "jump" you imagined—and giving any kind of mechanical explanation is sort of lame, IMO.

There's also the puzzle of who exactly she is talking to: Is it just her brother-in-law (in the dark, she mistook him for her husband) or is it her bro-in-law inside her husband's body? The situation is unclear because what she says can be taken either way. I actually did think about using "kill" to clarify it, but decided I liked the parallelism between the verbs ("You are not X"; "No, but I will be Y") which is part of what give his riposte its creepiness, I think.

Two puzzles; clarifying one won't clarify the other; clarifying both would clutter the cover. It became a choice between leaving it as it was; coming up with a totally new scenario; or just abandoning it. I almost stuck it in the trash, but decided "what the hell" instead.

The puzzles don't go away, and they do weaken it. All that cover can do is try to get by on style.

(None of what I just said is important; I'm just agreeing with you and pleading foreknowledge of its defects.)

[Three-Dollar William] this was the only one I thought could have been better

Another one I'm not terribly happy with. Basically it's an excuse for some silly wordplay on "counterfeit bills." Even the "Plus" story, with its glancing reference to one of "Bill" Shakespeare's cross-dressing plays, is supposed to be part of the "fun." Probably you'll only like this sort of thing if you're the kind of person who likes this sort of thing.

BtW, I have to admit I'm a little surprised that "Cain and Mabel" had nice things said about it: It has no laughs or latent absurdity, and for me putting that kind of thing in is 90% of the fun. I stopped making "Chameleon" covers, and gave up on some contemporary-themed work, because they all felt too plausible—see the 3 attached "Chameleon" covers and the 1 "Carcass" cover to see what I mean. If you showed me a dozen stories based exactly on these plot synopses, I wouldn't bat an eye.

[Note of explanation: "Carcass" was going to be a new title for "mature-readers" TG fiction.]

A sorta-special collection of "Body Crime" titles here. Basically, these are covers that for one reason or another just didn't gel to my satisfaction. So, after writing "The Man Who Wasn't There", I just tried plugging "Dirk Dirkson" (body-hopping special agent) in them and hoped that would seal up the holes.

[BTW, I realized after the story got posted that I'd misread femur's original, and that it was supposed to be "Dick Dirkson." I've stuck with "Dirk" in these covers, for no good reason.]

"Gamble of a Lifetime": One of my few attempts to create a "Dirk Dirkson" from scratch.

"Another Lie to Live": This one lacked a good tag line. (Maybe it lacks a good everything-else, too. It's pretty baroque.) So I just stuck "Dirk Dirkson" in.

"Movers and Fakers": Not quite "from scratch" but almost. Something in the guy's pose screamed "amnesia," but nothing clicked until I thought he might be Dirkson—and the girl was after the medallion.

"The Devil in Nurse Jones": Another one where I had nothing to go in the tag line. Probably I should have just left it out, a la Andi's BC covers. But I have a Tolkien-like inability to discard my own established continuity, so I kept the tag line but just stuck "Dirk Dirkson" in. BtW, if anyone asks how the CCA let the word "blow job" go out on a cover, I'll remind you that there is precedent. :p

"The Joker in the Pack": Had to spend all the blurb on explaining the confidence game and crew and using the "poker hand" metaphor. How to get the TG element in? Well, everyone knows "Dirk Dirkson" doesn't mind playing a woman! :rolleyes:

"Five Mobile Corpses": Inspired by a serendipitous image, but not much fun. (Well, I'll confess I'd pick it up out of curiosity ...)

"American Idyll": Another contemporary cover, hard to work any TG elements in, nothing exciting (except the usual sex play) seems in evidence ... thought "what the hell," imagine it's Dirk Dirkson and stuff.

"The Man Who Wasn't There": Finally, there is no topping femur's cheeky original, which inspired me to write "The Man Who Wasn't There." Still, while looking through covers online I stumbled on some artwork that looked like a perfect complement to what I'd written. I've no desire to compete with femur's cover, and the artistic style of what I found is wrong for a 1940s or 1950s comic book cover anyway. So I decided to stick it on the cover of a "Body Crime" as a contemporary "reprint."

Thanks as always.
cain & mabel, good story! Powerful!
Family Reunion, scary & clever
Badge, good story
Scales of Justice, well done
First, Do Lots of Harm, clever
Gamble, funny & good story
Another Lie to Live, LOL I love the story
Movers and Fakers, clever. I love the fact with amensia in he wrong body!
The devil., ROFLOL! & OUCH
American Idle, good story
Man who wasn't there, scary

eric

Well, this is the last of my backlog. It'll probably be awhile before I have more stuff.

"Smuggler's Glenda": Anytime you have burly guys calling each other "girls," you have comedy. At least, IMHO.

"Blackmail and Body Jumping": Can anyone really blame the boss for wanting to take the secretary's body for a ride?

"The Black Stockings Scandal": A little unusual, but that's about all I can say for it.

"Head Fakes": Okay, I'll admit to liking this one. Dirty cop and pretty girl getting each other in trouble—I don't need any more to make me want to read it.

More good ones. Head Fakes is a classic in the poetic justice style.

Hiya kids! Remember me? What with one thing and another I absented myself, but I got the modcover bug again recently. Many thanks to femur for helping thru an account conversion glitch.

Without further ado, away we go ...

"Hostage Crisis": An old one I had on my computer. Gave it a low issue number because the situation is obvious, and would have been submitted to an editor early on, I think.

"Killer's Kiss": Another old, held back cuz I thought it too violent for a non-crime title, but not criminally minded enough for "Body Crime." Decided to fudge the issue by making it a "Body Crime" reprint of a story from another title.

"Angel of Mercy, Angel of Death": If you've ever seen "Arsenic and Old Lace," you probably can't look at the "killer" in that image without thinking of poor Jonathan, whom the plastic surgeon done up to look like Boris Karloff. Or is it just me who makes that connection?

"Granny with a Gun": The "story" doesn't bear close scrutiny. Just did it for the gag.

"How to Murder a Millionaire": Another old one I wanted to get out of limbo. I hope the "story idea" is clear enough.

"Heartbreak and the Hippocratic Oath": Originally this was going to be a "Body Shift," but the body shifted to another title entirely. I think like its baroque silliness, if I say so myself.

"Vengeance of the Wu Tang Clan": If we examine the issue number, we'll see that this story came out in 1985. If anything, the musical act owes TG Comics royalties!

"The Champagne Suicides": An image and title I've been trying to use for a long time. I think I finally came up with a tag line that is at least suggestive of a story line, but like most contemporary titles, it's pretty damn allusive.

Late to the party again. LOL!

Loving the old school noir/pulp fiction stuff. it's SO more my taste then the old romance stuff that's usually done.

Keep 'em coming. :)

Dee

.................................................. ...
THE CONTINENTALS. Murder, mystery, intrigue, adventure--And cross dressing
www.webcomicsnation.com/moniquem/continentals/seri es.php

Really excellent Body Crime covers. I especially like Heartbreak and the Hippocratic Oath. The Wu Tang Clan cover is very good too, though I perhaps would have picked up the contrast a bit to make the picture match the heading better. I've been struggling myself with the same cover as you used for How To Murder A Millionaire without coming up with a decent idea. Yours is great, and I can cross that cover off my list!

Another fine batch of Body Crime covers up today. Kiss Me Stupid made me laugh; if that horrid orange plaid coat belongs to the girl, she deserves to be shot!

Thanks, update is really funny. Especially naked & Moonlight is very witty & original

Thanks for the kind words, everyone! I plan on updating the Body Crime section once a week each Friday; eight covers each update, with between three and five of those eight being brand new. At that rate, I will be updating through the middle of February. Other titles (like "Another Life to Lead" will be updated once a week during the week.)

Quick notes, reactions, explanations:

I am 99% certain I need to credit someone with the phrase "Femme Chem," as used on "A Perilous Cargo." I thought the term was used in this thread, but a quick glance doesn't reveal it to me. To whomever came up with it: Thanks!

AndiJF wrote: Kiss Me Stupid made me laugh

I have to confess that "Kiss Me Stupid" hardly needed any modification: The Original. In fact, after making my Body Crime cover but before uploading it, I discovered that SoCalSecret used the same cover and did mostly the same gag only by removing "wo" from the original speech balloon.

Off-topic: Everyone, in unison "Aiiggghhhh! Sideshow Bob!"

AndiJF also wrote: The Wu Tang Clan cover is very good too, though I perhaps would have picked up the contrast a bit to make the picture match the heading better.

I find myself wondering if my computer's display calibrations are out of sync with the rest of the world's. I do my best to integrate the new elements with the old in my covers, with appropriate fading and blurring, and I get them to the point where my eye says they're pretty close. And then someone will make a comment that suggests they are NOT as well integrated as I think they are.

I dunno. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. Or, now that I look at the Wu Tang cover, maybe it's because I unconsciously had decided that I WANTED the image to be more faded than the rest of the cover, to convey a semi-Oriental mistiness. But I've already tweaked it for the eventual upload to the main site, to bring them closer together in appearance. How's this:

than ks for the latest! Many really funny ones. My favorites are

M,ALE DELIVERY, OUCH MAJOR PUN! You should be ashamed!
The Nightingale's Dilemma! Both funny & a very good story
Bait and Switch! roflol!
I Was a Teenage Bodyswap Artist. witty & LOL

Great new batch. As Eric says The Nightingale's Dilemma packs a really good storyline into one image. Male Delivery tickled my punny-bone too.

I think Wu Tang Take 2 is definitely an improvement, BTW

Homer's horsing around could lead to a real troygedy.

Excellent work!

Thanks for the updates

my favorites

Victor Cano is funny & clever!
Honeymoon killers is funny

IF ONLY I HAD SOME TITS, LOL! witty & clever!
BONNIE CARLOF STORY, NOW THAT'S A Real horror story!
HIGH CLASS BODY SHOW ROOMS, Excellent story! & funny do the men Get the female's bodies?
BELLHOP, is LOL & interesting